News Flash

Great; just heard that the Chantix might be linked to a suicide or two. And I thought my black mood this past weekend was due to withdrawal from the Chantix and my week off my "Miracle Cream".


I said when I got the Chantix that it hadn't been on the market long enough -- I (or the scientists) really didn't know what side effects there might be but I had debated it and with sound mind, decided to take the chance. I was practically weaned off the Chantix and then this past weekend I struggled so on Saturday that finally I took a pill and another on Sunday, 1/2 on Monday. I set out 1/4 for today but haven't taken it.


As I have no intention of suicide, guess I will just quit those darn pills and be mean and rotten. Perhaps you remember in an earlier post (or maybe it was just in a letter to someone) I said, maybe I really am just mean and whiney, as a non-smoker. Guess we are going to have to find out.

For a non-smoker, you will be thinking, geesh, she's been quit for 3 months. Get over it. You'll think that bad habit should be all behind me. Wish it was . . .

if you don't smoke, never start, Love, Ma


PS: Uncle Dick told me if the day ever comes when they tell him "you have 2 years, or 6 mo. or whatever", he'll be smoking. And he's been quit for 10 or 15 years now.

Old Habits Die Hard

Here I am, on November 24, coming up on the three month anniversary of quitting smoking. For the past week I have been struggling a bit more than I had been, just at different, odd times. And I've been grumpier, or quicker to "flare", anyway. Just ask Lanny.

I think this is because I gave up the medicine a week to ten days ago. I believe the last vestiges of both the nicotine and the "quit smoking" drug have now been dredged from every last fat cell, nerve ending and brain receptor. With that huge ol' addiction gone, I just have to work on getting past all the old, long engrained habits. I just have to keep plugging away, one day at a time.

But I still carry the last of the quit smoking pills in my purse. Just in case . . .

My Watch

I babysat today, for Miss Audri Lu. I sang to her "Audri Lu" . . . to the tune of Mary Lou, way back when by Ricky Nelson. "Hello, Audri Lu, Goodbye heart" . . . well, it was cuter when it was just her and me. I remember Morghan Grace's song was, and still is, "Morghan Grace, you have the cutest little baby face" and if I work at it, I'll come up with the personal little songs for the other grandbabes.

I take the "watch" seriously, even enjoying every minute of the grandbaby time.

It is not just Audri, but started with Morghan Grace and continues down the line. I still sleep on the davenport when the Small Frey are here camped out on the livingroom floor. When the Little Hofs are at the cabin or when I'm in charge with Audri. I check them all when they are sleeping. Make them stir. I uncover Audri's little nose when she drags the blanket up over her head as she is want to do, and as I did for the other six before her.

When I take little ones to the Beach at Too, I sit with my back to the beach and count heads in the water. (I "feel" my mother in me, watching 9 of us at the beach -- no wonder we didn't get to swim very often!)